A month ago I had to perform a 24-hour urine test.

This involves urinating over the course of 24 hours into a 5-litre plastic container supplied by my GP’s surgery.

(I didn’t fill it: I don’t know whether that’s a good or bad thing.)

I delivered said semi-full plastic container to my local hospital’s pathology lab as instructed.

The hospital lost the sample.

Two weeks ago I therefore had to perform a second 24-hour urine test.

(Again, I didn’t fill the container.  I’m not particularly competitive but for some reason this made me feel slightly guilty.)

The Minister’s Wife delivered second said semi-full plastic container to my local hospital’s pathology lab.

The hospital rejected the sample.

The hospital’s pathology lab claims the sample was in the incorrect plastic container.

My GP’s surgery sources plastic containers for 24-hour urine tests directly from, er, my local hospital’s pathology lab.

At least my GP had the decency to sound a little abashed on the phone this morning.

Meanwhile we’re a month down the path and nobody knows one way or the other whether my kidneys are working even semi-properly.

Fucking magnificent.

Anybody got Bupa’s number?