The repeats of This Life finished last night. Jesus, that was an overrated series (with the exception of the last five minutes of the final episode). Only Cold Feet has since been more unjustifiably adored by meeja hors the length and breadth of, er, central London.

One thing really concerns me about the “reunion”: mobile phones. How the Hell will they eke out 90 minutes now everyone has a mobile?

Where would the wafer-thin original plots have been if Egg hadn’t had to keep running from the cafe to the phone box to whine at Milly? Could they really have strung out the tedium of “Miles and Anna” for 32 episodes if they’d been able to text each other and sort it out once and for all within five, 10 minutes tops? And the others (whoever they were); I’m sure all their problems would have been sorted out quickly and simply if only their pockets had been bulging with Nokias instead of pharmaceutically-induced erections.

I was a trainee solicitor in London in 1997. I know mobile phones existed.

Realism, my arse.