Minister watches Brits; becomes his father
- What the fuck are U2 thinking?
- Would someone please give Kylie something to eat?
- When will people twig that Gavin & Stacey is actually the precise opposite of funny?
- Lionel Richie?
- Lionel fucking Richie?!
- Is it me you’re looking for…?
- Jesus wept: is THAT what Cheryl Cole sounds like?
- The ginga one’s a bit rough, too, isn’t she?
- Are Coldplay as pissed off with that fucking Jerusalem song as everyone else?
- Why has Natalie Imbruglia started trying to morph into Dannii Minogue?
- Has Jamie Oliver had tongue reduction surgery?
- How the fuck has Fearne Cotton managed to sustain a presenting career lasting nearly a decade?
- Did Take That really give synchronised Nazi salutes while wearing black shirts?
- Do you remember when the Brits were vaguely worth watching instead of pathetic vehicles for gimps like The Hoff?
- Why can’t Elbow share a couple of their pies with Kylie?
- What do you mean there’s no whisky left?
- Did you know Gok Wan is an anagram of Go Wank?
- You can’t seriously expect me to sit through The Ting Tings without booze?
- Alan Carr? Is it too late to get Lionel and The Hoff back?
- Aren’t Girls Aloud such a charming bunch of self-effacing ladies?
- Since when does releasing the same record for 25 years qualify as an “outstanding contribution to British music”?
- Whoever that is is no Dusty Springfield, is she?
- Surely there must be something better on QVC?
The British Phonographic Industry Awards 2009, brought to you in association with The Minister, Zattoo and Lagavulin.