Courts don’t ordinarily send old age pensioners to prison.

I hope the courts would consider making an exception were it to be proven – as alleged in today’s Manchester Guardian newspaper – that Kenneth William Bates, a 75-year-old spinster of the parish of Elland Road, had behaved contrary to section 216 of the Insolvency Act 1986.

Readers with long-ish memories might recall that Kuddly Komrade Ken was keen on a zero tolerance approach to football hooliganism during his time as chairman of Chelsea FC, once proposing to electrify perimiter fencing to keep the thugs in check.

The Ministry admires such authoritarianism, particularly in the field of white collar crime, and would welcome any moves by the judiciary to enforce strictly the sentencing powers given to them as part of the ongoing war on chancerism.