At this time of night the slightest thing can make me laugh, like the web forum discussions entitled “Top 5 Most Annoying Things Jeremy Kyle Does” and “Jeremy Kyle – why is he such a tosser?

I introduced my 60-year-old father to Jezza’s programme this morning. He wasn’t impressed by my suggestion that we should get a DNA test done, just to be on the safe side.

Paul Snowball has successfully sold me the car.

Though I’m making him replace the cam belt first.

And no, I don’t know what a cam belt is. But UsedCarExpert.co.uk does.