There are no words.

Dubai shares plummet – LIVE

Yeah! Right on! WOO-HOO!

Reading the thoughts of someone watching a computer screen reporting what happens when other people watch their computer screens is PRECISELY the role the Harry Potter Bugle should be playing in the 21st century.

Meanwhile, in other news, Stephen Fry has also used a computer today. Read all about it in the Guardian.

Brewery launches Tactical Nuclear Penguin, ‘world’s strongest’ beer

A Scottish brewery, with a history of controversy, claims to have made the world’s strongest beer.

 

By John Bingham
Published: 12:04PM GMT 27 Nov 2009

BrewDog Managing Director with bottle of Tactical Nuclear Penguin, the worlds strongest beer Photo: Central Scotland News Agency

I want to go to there (redux).

On having homosexuality explained

“That’s gross. Not the bit about girls kissing girls though, that’s pretty good.”

School

“I don’t understand why I have to go to school at all, the internet knows more than all the teachers there put together.”

Religion

“If I was god I would make all the girls in the world wear no clothes.”

On the floor.

Pick me up.

Bring rope and tackle.

Jesus ‘may have visited England’, says Scottish academic

Could Jesus Christ have visited Glastonbury?

Jesus Christ could have come to Britain to further his education, according to a Scottish academic.

Church of Scotland minister Dr Gordon Strachan makes the claim in a new film entitled And Did Those Feet.

The film examines the story of Jesus’ supposed visit, which survives in the popular hymn Jerusalem.

Dr Strachan believes it is “plausible” Jesus came to England for his studies, as it was the forefront of learning 2,000 years ago.

“Coming this far wasn’t in fact that far in the olden days,” Dr Strachan told BBC Radio 4′s The World At One. “The Romans came here at the same time and they found it quite easy.”

Dr Strachan added that Jesus had “plenty of time” to do the journey, as little was known about his life before the age of 30.

The legend that Jesus Christ came to Britain was popularised in a poem written by William Blake in the early 19th Century and made famous as a hymn 100 years later.

William Blake’s “Jerusalem” spread the idea Jesus came to England

Now the first words of the hymn – “And did those feet” – are the title of a new film based on a book researched by Dr Strachan, who lectures on the history of architecture at Edinburgh University.

“It is generally suggested that he came to the west of England with his uncle, Joseph of Arimathea, who was here for tin,” said the academic.

Dr Strachan claimed Jesus Christ could have come to England to further his education.

“He needed to go around to learn to learn bits and pieces about ancient wisdom, and the druids in Britain went back hundreds if not thousands of years. He probably came here to meet the druids, to share his wisdom and gain theirs.”

Among the places Jesus is said to have visited are Penzance, Falmouth, St-Just-in-Roseland and Looe, which are all in Cornwall, as well as Glastonbury in Somerset – which has particular legends about Jesus.

“St Augustine wrote to the Pope to say he’d discovered a church in Glastonbury built by followers of Jesus. But St Gildas (a 6th-Century British cleric) said it was built by Jesus himself. It’s a very very ancient church which went back perhaps to AD37″

The film And Did Those Feet is launched at the British Film Institute on Friday 26 November.

Well, as I understand it, he was a carpenter.

Think of all the immigrant manual workers who have come from the east to sponge off the UK’s welfare state in recent years – when, for instance, was the last time you hired an indigenous plumber?

QED.

Today I had a brain scan; witnessed from 20 feet a high-speed collision between two cars; accidentally visited St. Neots; and had to endure a conversation with my employer’s Human Resources Director.

But this still made me laugh.